Track America's political climate as its citizens eschew the hackneyed illusion of red
and blue states, and the seDUCKtive cattle dog-led revolution turns ALL states yellow.

Members in Good Standing of the Order of the Duck, effective 4.10.07

Our motto: "Never embarrass your cattle dog"

PAGE 1

. . . A  S   T H E   D U C K   W A D D L E S  . . .

PAGE 1:
North Carolina
Pennsylvania
Arizona
California
Montana
Michigan

PAGE 2:
Illinois
Ohio
Indiana

PAGE 3:
Ohio Redux
Texas
British Columbia
Washington

Page 4:
Utah
Mississippi

 

Exclusive Photos: Duck on the Lam from Katrina

Page 5:
Back home to NC
Eastern NC
Pennsylvania redux
Nevada
Virginia
New York


Note to The Shriek readers: The duck has a mind of its own and we have only nominal control over its next move. However, if your ACD is eager to take part in the Société initiation, e-mail wayoutacd <at> aol.com. If you have completed photos, e-mail them to ssp <at> email.unc.edu.

The Shriek staff refuses liability for any psychological trauma encountered by Australian Cattle Dogs in the enactment of this secret ritual.

(To complete the e-mail addresses, take out the spaces and replace the <at> with @)


Featured new quasi-member: Crash Buetow-Branson | Catlandish Ambassador taken against its will by the duck's boa gene when feeding time passed without hope of even bread crumbs for dinner.

Exclusive to The Shriek, what follows is a first- person account by duck groupie Khaki Campbell who has been waddling after the duck suit as it makes its way across North America:

Billings, MT - Commando forces recently stormed the offices of a prominent Montana attorney to reclaim a purloined duck costume. The duck suit is rumored to be a valuable relic of a secret society and reportedly was in the hands of a rebel faction belonging to an fringe MSN newsgroup.

The leader of the commando forces, said to be a militant group of authoritarian cattle dogs, wore a dark double mask and barked out orders in a commanding tone. In short order, the duck suit was under their control and able to continue on its appointed journey across the country.

The Montana attorney made a daring effort to maintain control of the suit but was overpowered by two young thugs who cornered her on top of her desk and nipped voraciously at her heels while shrieking in exceptionally high-pitched tones. The windows were shattered for three city blocks and one of the Montana attorney's dogs shouted Uncle! as he was likewise hounded through the room
. A positive ID was difficult to make on said dog because he was wearing what at first glance seemed to be round, dark glasses. The other will be easy to finger (or paw, as the case may be) in a police lineup due to what was reported to be a deformed ear.

The Daily Shriek fears that this group of pretenders has not been heard from for the last time and in fact may already have had the opportunity to implant a homing device in the head of the duck. Time will surely tell as The Shriek follows this troubling tale of instability among cattle dog factions . . .

 


1

N
O
R
T
H

C
A
R
O
L
I
N
A

 

MARS Phillips, blissfully unaware
that she is a Siamese Duck

2

P
E
N
N
S
Y
L
V
A
N
I
A

PRINCE SLATE of Elder, first dog jailed while
wearing the suit. (See DISGRACED ROYALTY)

TASSEL of Elder (Lovely and Delicate and one with the duck)

COMRADE KIT, ruler of Elder, plotting revenge

3

A
R
I
Z
O
N
A

SAPHIE Pardee (really trying to get inside the duck's head)

DOTTIE Pardee, the Carmen Miranda of cattle dogs

4

C
A
L
I
F
O
R
N
I
A

CALLIE Mejia, distrustful of the duck's intentions

BANDIT Mejia, carrying the weight of the duck on his head

LEXIE Mejia, caught in the wrong place
at the wrong time with the wrong duck

5

M
O
N
T
A
N
A

ALLY Tudor, the reluctant star of Still Life with Koi and Duck

6

M
O
N
T
A
N
A

POE Rosenquist: Look into our eyes, look deep into our eyes, you are getting v-e-r-y sleepy . . .

FINN Rosenquist, tracking duck extraordinaire

 

TESSA Rosenquist: We vant to be alone . . .

7

M
I
C
H
I
G
A
N

GIDGET Ambrose: Hootchy-Cootchy-CattleDuckDog

OSCAR Ambrose: Dog and Duck dressed for Mardi Gras

NONA Ambrose: Assuming dominion over the duck